lost-symphonies

It was this time last year that.... - The philippine government was stable. at least it's not as bad as how it is today, where i'm constantly anxious about my future in this country - i was spending my last few weeks at my first job before leaving. it just was not working out for me - i spent those last weeks more chill than usual, with the friends i had then - i was having board game session's at a person's house - those were always fun. - i was still going out every weekend and every other weekday - i started hosting drinking sessions at my house X by TurboMac <iframe style="vertical-align: bottom ! important; position: relativ

why is it so hard for me to make a freaking decision. there are so many things going on in my head but the best word i can use to describe my feelings and where i'm at in life is stuck. i'm stuck with myself and my insecurities. i'm stuck with my feelings. i'm stuck with my choices and lack of confidence in myself, my future, and my happiness. i'm not sure if it will really always be this way. i want to rant and rant forever but i know it won't help. i just want to find a way, a shoulder to lean on, and just release all my frustrations, confusion, and anxiety. but i feel like i only have myself.

Just wanna get this out there before I start with work again. So today is my birthday and i've always had mixed feelings about it. i used to always think they weren't such a big deal but at the same time, being greeted matters to me. if i thought last year was different, this year is insane. SPOILER ALERT: the next few words might make you think i'm shallow was fuck. if you think so, please stop reading. for the past few years, i've always wanted to hide my birthday on facebook, to see who would really remember. i never did because of fear that no one will greet me on my special day. this year, i decided to do it. i've been going through so